reader question about "smart girl"-childhood

So. One of you-all asked me a question using lj's messaging*, and I'm not sure whether that person meant to remain anonymous, so I will err in that direction. Loosely paraphrased, the question had this frame: the person in question has a smart little daughter and is wondering which bits I thought were particularly positively influential about my upbringing, and what I would want parents of a smart daughter to know. The way the question was phrased makes me think that this person would welcome answers from other people, and from the parenting end as well, because so far I only have answers from being the smart little girl, not from having one. Person wonders what life is like as a smart girl (not having identified as same and not having a partner who identified as same) and how my parents treated me.

Most of the stuff I'm thinking of is non-gendered. So I'll hit those few exceptions first and then go on to generic kid stuff. ( quick thoughts on gender differences for smart kid experiences on the average )

The rest of it...( got rambly )