Open Letter to the Neighbors

[mrissa]

Dear Neighbors to the South:

This marks the ninth hour straight that you've been burning stuff. You burned stuff all day yesterday. How much stuff have you got? I mean, I know we both have wooded backyards, but this is getting ridiculous. We're moving from "disposal of leaves" territory (and why? when the yard waste people will pick up as many bags as you like!) into "sinister cover-up" territory here.

I didn't hate you before, even though you opened my misdelivered letter from Lizzie on a Wednesday and didn't see fit to return it to me until Sunday afternoon. But you cannot flood a scent-oriented person's living area with smoke for two days straight and have her unaffected. Even if it's a pleasant woodsy smoke that makes my hair smell autumnal once I've driven away from it. Having the windows closed makes only enough difference to allow me to breathe and occasionally choke down food. You suck, neighbors to the south.

Nine hours for two days straight. What the hell is wrong with you people? No apple bread for you. And no Christmas cookies. Honestly.

M'ris

Comments

[minnehaha.livejournal.com]

Have you considered calling the police?

B

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

I hadn't, actually. Is it illegal to burn your own leaves in your own yard? Or is it just the duration that makes it a nuisance?

[minnehaha.livejournal.com]

"Is it illegal to burn your own leaves in your own yard?"

I don't know. The police are likely to, though.

"Or is it just the duration that makes it a nuisance?"

Sounds like it's a nuisance to you, certainly.

What the police will do is knock on their door and tell them that neighbors are complaining about the smoke and ash. It's a way for you to safely, and anonymously, complain to your neighbors. And it just might get them to stop.

B

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it's clearly a nuisance in the "this bugs me" sense. I just didn't know if it was in the "and they all moved back, and we had a great time sittin' there on the Group W bench" sense.

It's a good idea, though. Thanks.

[(Anonymous)]

In some cities it is illegal to burn your yard waste. I know it is illegal in Farmington, but I can't vouch for the legality in Eagan.

Heathah

[(Anonymous)]

Scratch that, it's illegal. The Eagan website has information on legal and illegal garbage disposal and burning is a big no-no.

Heathah

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

How very sensible of you, to look it up!

Thanks. I hope not to have to use this information tomorrow, but one does what one must.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

This is how Minnesotans get revenge on each other: we don't give each other homemade baked goods.

Ooooooh, I'm scary.

[scottjames.livejournal.com]

I really hope I never piss you off, then.

[flewellyn.livejournal.com]

Or, worse, we DO give each other lutefisk.

[minnehaha.livejournal.com]

Certainly more likely to be effective than complaining to LJ.

B

[minnehaha.livejournal.com]

You live in Eagan?

Do you like it?

K.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

I think I'd have to go with "mostly."

We spent a good deal of time looking for houses in the Lake Nokomis area and other similar neighborhoods in Mpls-proper, but when we were looking, there were no 4+-bedrooms on the market and no decent-looking duplexes. (I think there were some of each with major structural problems, but we were only up for dealing with cosmetic problems or minor structural problems, not with having to tear down an entire wing of the house and start over.) Since we are three adults who all work from home, we kept looking at the available houses in the neighborhoods we'd wanted and thinking that it would be crowded to begin with, that we could never have more than one person to stay (as opposed to the five we've had here for holidays twice now), and that the minute we were ready to spawn, we'd have to move automatically. So we got a house in a neighborhood where no two houses are the same, and that puts it one up on much of Eagan. By our California standards it's a quick jump up to Minneapolis or St. Paul, so we go up to both cities often. Also, the airport is 10 minutes away, and that's really convenient.

There are some things about the suburban experience that I could take or leave. I would prefer, for example, to have a coffee place that wasn't Caribou or Panera somewhere near here. Mostly it's fine, though.

[mamapduck.livejournal.com]

If it's legal, you might pop over and ask them to stop.
If it's illegal, you might do that or, depending on your relations with them, you might simply call the police or fire department and report the smoke. If you call the FD, resist the temptation to simply report smoke. While it would be funny on some level to bring sirens and clanging bells down on the offending heads, it's not nice to the firefighters.

(She is not nearly so subtle as she is. She has been known to holler, "I smell smoke! FIRE!" when people light up in non-smoking areas. She prefers the direct approach. Or at least the smart ass one.)