In which we are concerned with cephalopod logistics though it is no longer hockey season.

[mrissa]

mrissa: And then markgritter was listing the places Vernor Vinge could have gone to see a live lobster. He went on at quite some length. Like, Byerly's, Red Lobster, the aquarium. Boston Gardens.
timprov: Um.
M: Okay, he didn't quite get so far as Boston Gardens.
T: Good. It's not like octopuses and Detroit.
M: I am concerned--I am suddenly quite concerned about the octopuses and Detroit.*
T: Like how at any moment--
M: Yes.
T: At any moment some guy there in Detroit has an octopus in his pants and you don't know it.
M: Yes. This concerns me greatly. Please tell me that Ziploc is involved.
T: I'm thinking no.
M: Or that nice friendly people such as the Detroit equivalent of United Noodle have sold the Red Wings fans some lovely dried octopus for their flinging needs?
T: Clearly not.
M: Oh, oh, oh, I am concerned. So in a regular plastic bag like a Target bag, just a whole dead octopus.
T: Possibly. If it was me I would use a thermos.
M: This is heartening.
T: But thermoses are not allowed in the arenas.
M: Not heartening!
T: But it's not like things that are not allowed in arenas never get in arenas.
M: And something like a smuggle-in beer belly contraption would be difficult to get the octopus out of--and although I hear octopuses are good at wriggling in and out of confined spaces, I expect that's mostly the live ones.
T: Never underestimate the power of the undead octopus.
M: No, I am concerned.
T: I think they have official Red Wings jackets with special pockets for the octopuses.
M, heartened: Do you? Like duck hunting jackets? Oh, I am relieved.
[pause]
M: Wait! I am not relieved! Oh why was I relieved?
T, laughing: If they don't, it's a marketing opportunity waiting to happen.
M: Now I really have to ask the internet how this works. And fear that it will answer me.

*Detroit Red Wings fans have been known to fling dead octopuses upon the ice. No, I cannot explain this to you. I am not a Detroit Red Wings fan.

Comments

[zunger.livejournal.com]

I would suggest that this is still infinitely less disturbing than the possibility of someone in Detroit having a live octopus in their pants, ziploc or no ziploc. Yet this is the mental picture I am now stuck with. Curse you, mrissa!

[pnkrokhockeymom.livejournal.com]

Um, the dead octopuses spontaneously generate in JLA due to all of the combined superfandom of the superfans in Hockey Town.

There you go. You just think really hard about it, and at the right moment, you'll have a dead octopus in your hands.

[apis-mellifera.livejournal.com]

It's because you used to have to win 8 times to with the Cup.

I believe there are guides online as to exactly how to sneak the octopus into the Joe (I know I read a guide in the Freep years ago). I believe it involves plastic wrap and duct tape and an abdomen. Hopefully not a really hairy one.

Oh, I love my team.

[jhetley.livejournal.com]

If you are worried about the potential of an undead octopus, avoid Tom Holt's BLONDE BOMBSHELL . . .

[akirlu.livejournal.com]

Until today I was entirely ignorant of this Detroit perversion. Gosh, to think I have lived four decades in ignorance. Gosh, to think that I could have lived four more, likewise. Mourn my loss.

It may, or may not, strike some as an interesting coincidence that I was just today admiring a cow-orker-s efforts in making a tentacular scarf (http://www.knitty.com/ISSUEwinter09/PATTtentacular.php).

But really, if Detroit fans had to throw something with eight legs, couldn't it just be four chickens, instead?

[mightyjesse.livejournal.com]

Oh, dear heaven, the continued giggling, it hurts us, precious. Laughter is good for the soul, but somewhat painful to broken ribses.

[fidelioscabinet.livejournal.com]

Down here, it's catfish. Not that it's often called for. I suppose you could slide one up your sleeve, for true convenience in extraction. They may fling a bit better than the cephalopods.

[sethb.livejournal.com]

Fortunately, your birthday is coming up.

[mamculuna.livejournal.com]

Octopuses can come in really small sizes (at least the dead ones at Whole Foods)--I can see putting several in your pocket, though if no bag was involved, you might not want to wear those pants again.

[batwrangler.livejournal.com]

I'd be even more concerned if live ones were involved.

[columbina.livejournal.com]

It apparently falls to me to note that "Boston Garden" - when we are discussing the place where people gather to see various arena-type events - is always singular. Actually these days it is Some Bank Whose Name We Can't Remember Garden, but everyone still calls it Boston Garden (actually, Bastan Gahden, but let's not be picky). But it is never plural, no no no no.

I had not previously considered the question of how the Red Wings fans get the dead cephalopods (notice how cleverly I avoided the long-burning flamewar about the proper plural of "octopus," there?) into the arena. I do not know that I should be thankful to Timprov for opening this avenue of thought in my mind.

[mkille.livejournal.com]

An octopus could probably be concealed in top hats, rasta caps, especially large berets...

[callunav.livejournal.com]

I'm deeply disturbed on behalf of the octopus/octopi/octopodes, because they are by and large bright and sweet-natured things that twitch the very tips of their tentacles when they dream like puppies dreaming of running.

On the other hand, I really, really love this transcribed conversation.

[nolly.livejournal.com]

Why did / does Vernor need to see a live lobster? I can't remember if the Scripps-Birch Aquarium has them, but there and Sea World would be good local-to-him starting points.