Wrong again!

[mrissa]

My dad wanted to get on the phone last night after Mom and I had talked, because I made him some mix CDs for his commute, and he wanted to tell me he was greatly amused by mishearing Dar Williams singing, "our parents do more drugs than we do," as, "Paris has more trucks than we do." Which was a perspective he had not expected.

Just now I misheard Liz Phair as singing, "one-eyed ingenue," when in fact she was singing, "wide-eyed ingenue." Oops.

I keep telling people that my main talent is getting the wrong end of the stick in an interesting way. Some of them even listen. Others probably think I said it was an interstellar way. Anybody who wants to write me and my dad a story about an interstellar one-eyed ingenue in Paris should feel perfectly welcome.

Have you had entertaining mistakes lately?

Comments

[scottjames.livejournal.com]

My wife had a song in which she was sure she heard the phrase, "..and I will poke my eyes out in surrender...."

After listening several times, I'm only reasonably sure that's not correct.

[zunger.livejournal.com]

You know, a one-eyed ingenue just sounds like a character calling out for a story. Screwball comedy among the cyclopes?

[zunger.livejournal.com]

"So be sweet and kind to mother
Now and then have a chat;
Buy her candy, or some flowers
Or a brand new hat; /
But maybe you had better let it go at that
Or... you may find yourself with a quite complex complex, and
You may end up like Oedipus
(I'd rather marry a duck-billed platypus!)
Than end up like old Oedipus Rex!"

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

I know that song! "I'm in love and always wimpy!"

I think of you when I blithely sing, "forty-five virgins and a pelican...." Which is not often these days, Pearl Jam being rather past its prime. But still. Also I think of you for, "I am a rock, I am in Thaiiiiiland," and, "If I knew Picasso, I would buy myself a great historic place." In fact, you are one of my main mistaken-lyric associations.

[scottjames.livejournal.com]

I normally sing, "forty-five versions of a pelican" when I hear that song.

Also: "I want to get me a little Bolivian baby...." That's one of my favorites.

I'm still mad at "Stairway to Heaven." My lyrics were so much better.

[mamapduck.livejournal.com]

I got, "45 virgins on a pelican" but pretty close!

Years ago Duran Duran had a new song out and the then boyfriend and I heard it on the radio. We looked at each other and simultaneously said, "She's a paper towel?" She was, in fact, a "femme fatale", but we both heard the same thing.

[tacithydra.livejournal.com]

Anybody who wants to write me and my dad a story about an interstellar one-eyed ingenue in Paris should feel perfectly welcome.


Yeah, but does she drive a truck?

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

I, too, sing about the Bolivian baby.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

markgritter and timprov and I were riding in the car with the radio on once, and all of a sudden Mark said, "Van Halen is overrated?" I looked into the backseat; Timprov was as baffled as I was, but we agreed that we indeed did think that Van Halen was overrated. After a small pause, I said, "Honey, did something bring that up in particular?"

The line was "that heaven is overrated." And now whenever Timprov and I hear that song without Mark, we grin at each other thinking of him.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

I leave it entirely to your discretion.

[miz-hatbox.livejournal.com]

Back when "Pretty Little Hate Machine" first came out, Mirth was quite sure that Trent Reznor was singing, "I was on the Muppets!"

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

I would pay good money to see Trent Reznor on Classic Muffet Feater. But then I do intend to pay good money for the DVDs with Uncle Alice (Cooper) on them.

(Robin said, "Uncle Tim needs some Classic Muffet Feater for his birthday." So we have been watching Classic Muffet Feater, Season One.)

[dsgood.livejournal.com]

Sign seen: Reincarnation Catholic Church.

Book seen at Uncle Hugo's: Castle of Liver. (Castle of Llyr)

Last year: "Terrible Coffee" for "Caribou Coffee."

Song lyrics

[markiv1111.livejournal.com]

There are, I believe, two books decidated to misheard song lyrics. (Trade paperbacks.) One of them may be called "'Scuse Me While I Kiss This Guy," after Jimi Hendrix's "'scuse me while I kiss the sky" in "Purple Haze." Another mention is the misheard Creedence Clearwater Revival "There's a bathroom on the right," not "There's a bad moon on the rise." Once you get the books, of course, there are dozens of other ones, mostly not quite that good. When I first heard "Venus" by the Shocking Blue, I was positive they were singing "Her well groomed hair with crystal eyes," rather than "Her weapons were her crystal eyes." And 37 years ago or so, some local music reviewer misquoted "Hey Jude" as "Well you know that it's a fool who plays it cool by making his wealth a little golder." Someone wrote him and said, "It's 'By making his belch a little bolder." (Of course, it's "By making his world a little colder.") And another Creedence auditory typo, "Willie goes into a dance and doubles all his loot" or "Devil's on the loose." It's actually "Willie goes into a dance and doubles on kazoo."

Nate

[telophase.livejournal.com]

It took me until a recent listen to a cover version of "Safety Dance" to figure out that the line I'd always heard as "Like an oxpecker in Brazil" was "You can act like an imbecile."

Back when Juice Newton's version of "Angel of the Morning" was receiving a lot of airplay (which probably dates me), a friend of mine could have sworn she was singing "Just touch my teeth before you leave me," instead of "cheek."

[bradipo.livejournal.com]

Dave Barry did two whole columns on the subject of song badness. Many people responded to his call for bad songs (it is a subject about which Americans care deeply), including people who didn't even know the correct name for the song they disliked. The example he gave for that category was "Ain't No Woman Like the One-eyed Gott," which seemed to go very well with your example.

I was in a piano bar once when the singer was doing "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" when the woman two seats over burst into laughter. She'd always thought the line was "the girl with colitis goes by."

Re: Song lyrics

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

See, now, when my daddy drove me to school, he always left me off with the words, "Have fun. Learn something," and now I have. I never knew that it was doubles on kazoo! My entire family will be enriched by this tidbit. I'm not kidding.

scottjames gets many of the associations because we discovered 'Scuse Me While I Kiss This Guy while browsing in a bookstore in high school and read bits of it out to each other. Eventually there was a mistaken-lyric-a-day calendar, which he bought me for a Christmas present.

"She's got a chicken to ride, but she don't care...."

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

I don't know about airplay per se, but Nancy and I did a mean Juice Newton duet in our painting class.

I think we baffled our professor, all things considered.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

The One-Eyed Gott and The Reverend Blue Jeans are old family favorites, yep.

[dichroic.livejournal.com]

Definitely the Reverend Blue Jeans. Actually, one of mine is Dar Williams: "What do you love more than milk".

Also, I happen to think Zed Patrol (or possibly Sand Patrol) is consideraly more intriguing than "Sad But True". I would *never* have figured that one out except that the latter is he actual title of the Metallica song, listed as such on the CD.

[genevra.livejournal.com]

Sounds like it's Dido's "White Flag". And I won't put my hands up and surrender

[jim0052.livejournal.com]

Someone I knew in college used to think the lyric "Keep on dancin', dancin' and a prancin'" was actually "Keep on dancin', dancin' on a frying pan."

And my wife used to think instead of "Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme," Simon & Garfunkel were actually singing, "Please save Rosemary's baby in time."

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

And you don't even know Zed! But you would like him. Zed is a very likeable fellow.

[writingortyping.livejournal.com]

Heh. My dad used to exclaim (in mock-horror) "Beet greens and blues?" during Sweet Baby James. It was marginally entertaining the first thirty-seven times I heard it.

I actually blogged my most entertaining stories of this type (http://www.writingortyping.com/C1393068736/E1543438817/index.html) quite a while ago.

I still can't believe "Someone saved my life tonight/Sugar bear," are the actual lyrics. I had thought for years I was mis-hearing them.

[reveritas.livejournal.com]

Well, i already busted out the story about RandyCon vs. JenCon so i can't use that one in here, but i did think the Beatles were singing "How could I dance with her mother ... WHOO! .. when i saw her standing there."

That was fine until Tiffany came out with the cover of that song and i asked my mom: "Shouldn't it be 'How could I dance with his father?'"

The story about "Paris has more trucks than we do" made my day. i shared it around.

[aszanoni.livejournal.com]

I really REALLY wanted to sing that song to my mother once. I refrained. Probably a good thing.

I sang "Pollution" instead. She was delighted.

My dad, having been introduced to Tom Lehrer not long ago, loves his music. My mother is baffled by it and does not see it as funny; she thought "Pollution" was terribly clever, though.

Dad enjoying Tom Lehrer made my day. :D

- Chica

[buymeaclue.livejournal.com]

People often aren't sure they heard me correctly when I mention that "I have a horse."

I've never been quite brave enough to ask what they thought I said.

[scottjames.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I think that's the one.

I won't put my hands up and surrender? Apparently I was wrong twice about that lyric.

[careswen.livejournal.com]

Just today, in fact. I saw a bucket in my building at work labeled "used bait." Looked back, saw that the full word curved around the bucket, which actually read "used batteries." What a relief.

And, as I read your post, I just happened to be listening to the Dar Williams cd greykev loaned us. This is a pleasing coincidence.

[eileenlufkin.livejournal.com]

So the story should be about the forbidden romance between the interstellar ingenue and the man of the cloth?

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

Or at least the entity of the cloth, yes.

(Let me just sit here and admire that pun a moment, shall I?)

Take as long as you like.

[eileenlufkin.livejournal.com]

I'm kind of marveling at the way it appeared in my brain myself. I think that's certainly the best and probably only pun I ever posted to livejournal. I don't think of myself as someone who makes very many puns at all.