More on saunas

[mrissa]

I don't like to share too much personal sexual information with people. There's a line in Dar Williams's "Iowa" that I just love: "But way back where I come from, we don't like to make a bother; We don't like to make our passions other people's concern. And we walk in the world of safe people, and at night we walk into our houses and burn." It's like that north of the border, too. It's not that we don't have burning passions. It's that we don't really think you should have to hear about them if you don't want to. Which is why an extreeeeemely small number of you have any idea what, specifically, gets me going, and why it's going to stay that way.

But. With that ominous beginning, I would just like to say: damn, people! Saunas! It's not just that sauna time is family time (although it is), it's -- saunas! If ever you are unfortunate enough to be consulted by someone who would like to seduce a Mrissa, please remember these words: NO SAUNAS! (Also, "Go away!" and "Shut up!" and "I don't know!" and "I don't want to talk about that with you!" may be useful words to remember. I know they would be for me if someone was consulting me about seducing the friendslist on average.)

rysmiel suggested that saunas are orthogonal to sex. This is a good data point to have from someone else's viewpoint. I asked those questions so I'd know how other people react, since I already know how I react. It's useful data. There's more than one sauna scene in Thermionic Night (and its sequels), but if you run across one where someone seems to be thinking unreasonably much about very, very unsexy topics in very, very unsexy ways, it is your collective fault. For my viewpoint, saunas are not orthogonal to sex; they are antithetical to sex. Saunas are either not warm enough to be any good or nearly too hot for me to stir myself to move out of. Much less to move around doing something active within the sauna. Saunas require at least 15 minutes of lying still somewhere cool afterwards, lying absolutely still lest the world disappear on you again, if you are a mrissa. (You know what? When I pass out, the world only sometimes goes black. Mostly it goes maroon or sometimes kind of a swirly purple. Also there is the gnat ballet. Anybody else get the gnat ballet? You never read about the world going maroon in books. Like the maroon of that one T-shirt you had, scottjames, you know the one.)

So. Saunas. All righty then. Useful information to have, but I'm really surprised at how overwhelmingly it depended on characters. I guess this is a bit of my own characterization instead of a law of nature.

Dude. Saunas.

Comments

[songwind.livejournal.com]

I've only passed out once, and it was so short I was conscious again before I hit the floor. Or at least, before I would have hit the floor if not for my mother and a fast-acting burly orderly. No gnats that I can think of.

Maybe it's just the whole "teenager in Arkansas and girls with no air conditioning" experience, but I just don't see the idea of sex in a sauna as absurd. I think you'd have to be pretty motivated, though, and neither person could be especially old or sensetive to heat.

Oh, btw, I would like being on the reading feedback filter as well. I don't remember if I posted a comment when you mentioned it before.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

You hadn't. I've added you.

[timprov.livejournal.com]

Where do you find girls with air conditioning? I hadn't realized that was an available feature.

[songwind.livejournal.com]

:) I figured I'd get some sort of smart-assed comment on that. I suppose I could have said "and houses with no air conditioning" but that wasn't specifically related to the subject at hand, nookie.

Though I've known a few girls who were chilly enough to make me suspect freon was involved somewhere.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

markgritter's theory is that I made my feet permanently cold by wading in Lake Superior when I was small. Like Achilles, except, you know, not invulnerable, and chillier.

[rysmiel.livejournal.com]

A similar hypothesis, though involving a different body of water, might well be applicable to my Adoptive Big Sister, I should suggest it to her.