Rule #1.

Apr. 3rd, 2007 10:51 pm
mrissa: (frustrated)
[personal profile] mrissa
Okay, people, what is the first rule of living in Minnesota?

No, it's not "do not make the women angry at you, for they may be smaller than the men, but they're meaner."

No, it's not "if you can't get it at Byerly's or Target, you may not need it."

No, it's not "indirection is the best rhetorical/interpersonal device ever."

No, it's not "respect the designated weirdos."

If you guessed, "DO NOT RUN OUT IN FRONT OF CARS IN AN ICE STORM, YOU STUPID, STUPID PERSON," you win the prize!

Thirty-eighth had some pretty treacherous spots. Lots of ice, when I was driving on it. I did not kill anyone driving home tonight, but that is entirely my doing and none of hers.

I am just now calming down.

I'm a little amused at myself that when I was pumping the brakes, steering into the skid, and trying not to hit this person, I didn't honk because I was afraid someone that dumb was dumb enough to stop in surprise. Instead I shrieked, "Wa! wa! wa! wa!" at her. Apparently in moments of crisis I become Charlie Brown's mom/teacher/etc. Then when the car had stopped and she was not dead, maimed, or in any other way in contact with my motor vehicle, I shouted, "Dumb stupid stupidhead!" at her. (She could not hear me, having continued trotting along the sidewalk.) There was no one to impress with the cleanliness of my language; heaven knows I've called people worse. But apparently I am Robin's age in the privacy of my own head.

Date: 2007-04-04 01:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] orbitalmechanic.livejournal.com
In my house we are trying to cut down on the swearing because "fuck" is only funny the first time it comes out of a one-year-old's mouth. My roommate is working hard to move himself over to "monkey trumpets." Maybe you guys could have an animal band!

Yesterday he came up to me and said: "Oh! The replacement for 'Jesus Christ' is 'Judas Priest.' Why did it take me so long to figure that out?" Uh, okay.

Date: 2007-04-04 01:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mrissa.livejournal.com
See also "cheese and rice."

"Fudge ripple" seems to work for people who have started and don't want to go the way they began.

We are very good at old-fashioned fake-swears here. My friend Marte has all of them, "oh, for the love of Pete!" and that sort of thing. With a very thick Minnesota accent. It's wonderful.

Date: 2007-04-04 02:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mormor1.livejournal.com
Oh jumpin'! I mean-- cats!!

You do come by the euphemisms honestly. I'm just sayin'. And I suspect that of all the people here who are grateful you were "only" shaken and not more seriously harmed, I believe I am truly the "gratefullest."

(Don't go messing up what we made. Daddy and I do good work.)

Date: 2007-04-04 03:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mrissa.livejournal.com
I even use Grandma Elaine's "Fee!" sometimes. Don't know if you ever heard it come out of my mouth, but it does.

Date: 2007-04-08 10:07 pm (UTC)
brooksmoses: (Default)
From: [personal profile] brooksmoses
[livejournal.com profile] suzimoses's mom has been known to use "sugar honey iced tea" on occasion. (Hint: it's a reverse-acronym.)

For a few months when I was quite young, I thought that "Joe Schetz" was an expletive. It's not, though; it's the name of one of my dad's colleagues.

January 2026

S M T W T F S
     123
45678910
1112131415 1617
18192021222324
252627 28293031

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Feb. 1st, 2026 03:24 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios