Why I Do Not Read the Jacket Copy, #446

[mrissa]

"Joining them this season is Emily Prentiss (Paget Brewster), who quickly learns there's nothing these agents would rather do than profile murderers and put them away!" -- the DVD box for my new Season 2 Criminal Minds DVDs

Now tell me honestly: isn't that on the list of lamest things ever? Seriously. It makes it sound like Mandy Patinkin is skipping around the plane singing, "We're gonna get a murderer, we're gonna get a murderer, wheeeee!"

Having tried to write synopses (shudder), I have some sympathy for the folks whose job it is to write these little thumbnails, but for heaven's sake.

Comments

[mamapduck.livejournal.com]

EEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!!!

"New team member Emily Prentiss (Paget Brewster) joins the team in their single-minded dedication to profiling and capturing murderers."

Better?

[barondave.livejournal.com]

Oh, better, definitely. But somehow... less sexy...

[mamapduck.livejournal.com]

Okay, you make it rational *and* sexy. :)

[leahbobet.livejournal.com]

"New team member Emily Prentiss (Paget Brewster) joins the team in their single-minded dedication to profiling and capturing murderers. And she wears awesome sweaters and reads Vonnegut."

Now it's sexy.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

Much.

[cyranocyrano.livejournal.com]

The other thing that sticks for me is "Um. What *else* would they be doing at work? It's like if Ethan Hawke joined a fishing boat crew, and quickly learned that there's nothing these fishermen would rather do than cast the net and catch fish!"

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

"Those crazy FBI profilers. They sure do profile! Boy howdy."

[cyranocyrano.livejournal.com]

"You know, back in my old FBI division, we used to knit all day. They called us the knitting team. We didn't actually catch any bad guys, but we turned out three pair of socks in a week."

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

"But boy were our hands soft from the lanolin! You could always tell an FBI agent by their soft, soft hands.

"Over in the CIA, now, they were more jute crocheters. You can get a nice purse that way, but it's hell on your hands. So we could spot a CIA agent from four craft store aisles away, just from their cracked, dry hands."

[rysmiel.livejournal.com]

Judging by Leningrad Cowboys Meet Moses, you can actually always spot a CIA agent by the big silver cigarette cases with "CIA" stamped on them.

[redbird]

And thank you for a laugh, for the MEN/DE, completely appropriate and equally unexpected.

[jimhines.livejournal.com]

That's just ... ow.

[poeticalpanther.livejournal.com]

I'm not a huge crank about it, but I did want to mention: there's a bit of a movement afoot among persons with handicaps to have people regard "that's so lame" as rather akin to "that's so gay".

Just a small thing, I know, but I thought I'd mention. Won't judge you if you decide not to adopt the shift, either. :)

[buymeaclue.livejournal.com]

Don't these agents have hobbies?

[crimini.livejournal.com]

I never read box copy, either. It always disappoints.

Then again, the biggest challenge is to make it sound attractive to viewers but not grotesque, snappy and sexy without being vulgar, and still get across the positive message that these are the "good guys" vs. "the bad guys".

"Wacky hijinks ensue" would probably not be the best phrase... ^.^

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

But they do fight crime!

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

Yes, in fact they do. That's part of the point of the show: sometimes there are a million things they would rather do than go catch murderers, but they do it anyway.

[jenfullmoon.livejournal.com]

I hate to say this, but what hobbies? Other than reading or doing magic tricks (if you're Reid), or JJ boinking that dude, they don't seem to have personal lives so much.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

I have not gotten to JJ and any dude yet. But Morgan dates a lot, Hotch is married with a kid and really seems to like house chores, JJ collects butterflies, Gideon is a birder and enjoys cooking and has a woman in his life who is freaked out by receiving heads in the mail....

[dd-b.livejournal.com]

Lots of law-enforcement types seem to be on-the-job 24 hours a day, which doesn't seem to leave much time for hobbies.

[katallen.livejournal.com]

::giggles at Mandy::

So nearly and vaguely correct yet still completely and utterly wrong -- for multiple meanings and levels of wrong.

[I think I'd be more attracted by something along the lines of -- In season two, the team is joined by Emily Prentis, who quickly learns that there's much more to the job than putting murders away.]

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

Yes. Or if they want melodrama: "the team is joined by Emily Prentiss, who has to learn fast--because innocent lives are on the line," or something like that. (tired)

[katallen.livejournal.com]

Yup - give me 'we're not your generic cop show, really!' or 'OMG! ALL-CAPS-DRAMA!' but save me from any 'gosh isn't this going to be FUN!?' daytime chat show hostiness.