An ass out of you and umption

[mrissa]

Crowded Culver's in the middle of Wisconsin. Table of four guys in their mid-twenties dressed in hunting winter camo and orange jackets, eating burgers and cheese curds and frozen custard. As I stood there propped against a wall waiting for a table to open up, it became clear what they were discussing:

"Like Mirror Dance? I liked that one, with the crazy clone brother."
"No, not Mirror Door, Mirador. It's a place. They're all places, all the titles. Fake word places."
"I just read Melusine."
"Well, you gotta borrow the others. There's this actress...."

I did not jump in to tell them that truepenny had put trains in the last volume, but oh, was I tempted.

Comments

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

I don't approach as much as I could at cons, either. Ingrained cultural stuff. I suspect that I am fast approaching the point--if I'm not past it already--where I know enough people that not approaching new people will make me "stuck-up" and "cliquey." Sigh.

[joeboo-k.livejournal.com]

I think there can easily be a perception, not necessarily of you specifically, that approaching someone can seem like intruding into a closed social circle. That all these people know each other and that the new person can feel like an interloper.

But, then, I think I'm also just socially wired to not intrude. Even granting a New York childhood before moving to Minnesota before high school.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

And while it's natural for a new person to feel like an interloper, I think that too many people then project that onto others: "I don't feel quite comfortable here" becomes "these people are making me uncomfortable" even if there isn't a great deal that the said people are doing or could be doing differently.

I had to learn to intrude a bit at cons, but mostly I just got to know enough people that I feel a great deal less like I'm intruding. If I was at a con where I knew nobody, I would still have a hard time poking my nose into conversations. I'd probably do it anyway, but it would be hard.